"Pick a Little, Talk a Little"

"Talk low, talk slow, and don't talk too much." John Wayne (1907 - 1979), Advice on acting


Fast talkers and low talkers are impossible for me to understand. Last Wednesday, in class, I couldn't understand my classmates. We had broken into two groups and were working on a project and I couldn't hear. I've obviously been relying on lip reading for some time now. I knew it was easier for me to hear if I could see the person's face but I didn't realize how much I was relying on lip reading. Last Wed., I didn't have a clue what my group members were saying if I couldn't see their faces. I only finished half of the project. Luckily, it was a group effort so it didn't cost me anything but it certainly did give me pause.

Today, a social worker came to the house to talk to my grandmother and tell us about possible support services for her, she's a fast talker, the social worker. Lovely woman, she just speaks quickly. I couldn't follow her conversation to save my life. She was offering me names and numbers and connections for possible internship opportunities, and I couldn't follow her conversation and write down what she'd just told me.

It hurt my brain.

The difficult combination of Central Auditory Processing Disorder and a decreased ability to maintain divided attention makes it almost impossible to take notes or remember anything said by a fast talker, or someone with an accent, or low talkers, or someone on a cell phone.

Have I written about Central Auditory Processing Disorders before? Well, pardon the repeat if I have. Basically a CAP is a problem with how the brain interprets sounds. My "hearing" is perfect. The biological mechanism of my ears works fine. Unfortunately, my brain doesn't always understand what my ears are hearing.

Picking out voices from background noise is a particular problem for me. I can't hear worth a damn in restaurants. Some movies are difficult. I frequently have to use the caption option even if the film is in English. Sometimes it's background music or other noise that makes it hard for me, other times it's an actor's accent. Speaking of accents, they're generally difficult, but the timbre of individual voices is also a consideration. Certain pitch levels don't work for me. This is especially true when I'm speaking to someone on a cellphone. Women are harder for me to understand than men, however, my uncle has a fairly deep voice and it, at times, impossible for me to hear.

Again, it's not really hearing. I can hear, it's interpretation.

Your ears work much like your eyes. Information is scanned by your eyes and sent to your brain which interprets what you see. Ears do the same thing. Sound comes in, it is coded and sent to your brain when the sounds are understood as words or music or whatever.

I'm in the process of trying to get a hearing aid through OVR. At present, it would cost me just over $1000. Yeah. Higher than you though, right? It's a special version that doesn't just amplify sounds, but actually picks out voices and dampens background noise via a small computer chip.

Retail price is somewhere in the $2500 range. Oh, and insurance doesn't cover hearing aids. You'd think it would, but alas, no such luck. At least my insurance doesn't cover them.

Honestly, I can't wait to get my hearing aid. It really does help tremendously. The audiologist gave me a loner to try before she wrote up the report and prescription and I couldn't believe the difference it made. I'm scared to death that I'm going to lose the thing - it's so small, but with it at least one part of me can be almost back to normal.

Experiencing life with this constellation of difficulties has, at the very least, made me more sensitive to what other people with more severe disabilities have to go through on a daily basis and I am changing my behavior. Now, when I leave phone messages, I speak slowly and make sure to repeat my number at the end of the message. SLOWLY. I can't tell you how many messages I've had to listen to again, and again just to decipher the correct phone number.

I'd like to continue this entry but I'm starting to get very tired. It's only 7:45 pm but I've had a long day, and the past few weeks have been a strain. I know I'm starting to drift because my visual focus is starting to drift, and I'm getting some doubling. There's still some reading I need to do for class tomorrow so I'll have to end things here.

Remember, speak slowly, stop mumbling and speak up. Please.